Loss of a friend.. Al-Fatihah

nearly 2 years ago I wrote here about my birthday wishlist.. & 1 of my wishes was for my friend to recover from Lymphoma.. However, i received the sad news early morning on 18th december.. he passed away 2.24am@ Hospital Ampang with his family by his side... I was breastfeeding early that morning when suddenly i received a message @ about 3am.. i was happy to see it was Afzal's phone number... but when i read the message, tears falling down my cheek.. it was a message from his brother Affendi, informing that he has passed away.. Inalillah.. He was intubated and induced coma from about 1pm the day earlier because he was having difficulty breathing & his blood pressure was crashing down..

I have loss a friend... a good friend that i would never forget..

to flashback on how I first met him... it was year 2000.. i first met him at the bowling alley in Kota Kinabalu during a interschool tournament.. it was my first bowling tournament.. Afzal & Jaffri represented La Salle school while me & my sister represented All saints School... we met again a few times during a few more bowling tournaments.. in 2001, i rarely see him as i have stopped playing bowling to concentrate on SPM..but we met again in 2002 @ Pusat Asasi Sains... he was there a few months before he was offered to pursue medicine in Sheffield University.. Me & my sister called him our "green button" because by seeing his face with his braces & curly hair, would always make us smile.. there is always "nur" in his face...He will always smiling...
Although he was in Sheffield pursuing medicine, he still keep in touch.

One day in 2008, I received a message from a friend who is studying @ Sheffield University as well... she told me that Afzal was diagnosed with Lymphoma... i was shocked... Afzal did not mentioned anything about his disease before this.. He wouldn't want us to worry about him...knwing the progress of Hodgkin's Lymphoma, i was worried.. He had undergone chemotherapy & like other people, he also experienced the side effects... I would always pray that Allah will ease his pain & suffering...
Afzal was a strong person... I couldn't imagine if i was in his shoes.. Although he was sick, he was able to study & graduated from medical school.. Alhamdulillah, he has graduated as a doctor.. but he couldn't practice as he was a patient as well.. He wanted to become a successful doctor, treating people to his best ability so that by the will of Allah, he can save lives, just as how he imagined it to be when he was a child... However, Allah has plans which has already been written.. early this year, Afzal's Lymphoma relapsed & this time it has spread to his liver & bones.. and again i couldn't hold my tears... i know the prognosis is bad...

Afzal was blessed with a supporting, caring mother who was always there for him.. and a wonderful family who always give him good supports & motivations.. I was sad to read these which was written by Mama Afzal ;

now part of me is happy for him because he is no longer suffering but a larger part of me is missing him so much. My baby is no longer with me. I am no longer able to take care of him for he is now under a more capable carer.
Al-fatihah for my friend, Mas Afzal.... You are a wonderful person that we will always remember in our hearts & will be missed...

If tears could build a stairway,
And memories a lane,
I'd walk right up to Heaven
And bring you home again.
Although it's difficult today to see beyond the sorrow,
May looking back in memory help comfort you tomorrow.

beautiful bouquet

I love bouquet.. to receive a bouquet is a wonderful feeling.. it's therapeutic..do u know that by looking at a bunch of beautiful flowers everyday can make u happy? It's striked me the idea 2 write about bouquet when i saw my friend, Erleena received a bouquet of roses for her 1st year wedding anniversary.. the last bouquet I received was during my 26th birthday early this year by my hubby (@ that time was fiancee :P) . he loves to give me flowers & i love it... hehe Hope that i'll get more & more in future.. hehe

This was my akad's wedding bouquet.. courtesy of my bff, shik...

i love this cute peonies...

and this unique tulips... difficult to get here

and this beautiful blue hydrangeas...

this was 1 of my hantaran masa my engagement... love the combination green cream so much..

and these sweet orchids...

calla lillies....


this lovely purple bouquet...

lovely peach .....

can i have this for my birthday, sayang? hehe

i love pink....

dusky pink roses with soft green double lisianthus, complemented by a profusion of tiny pink waxflower, green berries and seasonal foliages.

Hot pink Gerbera daisies, with pink roses & ranunculus and fragrant white hyacinth arranged in a glass bubble bowl.

don't u wish u have this lovely bouquet on ur table..i wish i can have a beautiful bouquet every day.. hehe or at least every week...

1 month old

Arianna Sofea is 1 month old .. Times flies… sekejap je my baby dah 1 month old.. I brought her to her 1st month vaccination @ SDMC on 10th December.. Her latest weight 3.88 kg.. naik nearly 1 kg since birth, happy :) dah besar sket anak mama ni :)

A mother's feeling

I never knew how it feels to be a mother until i become one... at this moment i couldn't imagine how my mother took care of me & my twin sister when we were small... taking care of my only lil one pun is sometimes tiring, but i enjoyed it so much... having 2 babies at the same time must be double the tiredness... Thank u so much Ibu for taking care of me ...

Before i become a mother, i didn't understand why some parents will cry during blood taking for their children... but when my baby Arianna was admitted to the hospital for jaundice, then i knew how it feels.. it's sad to see when they poke her to get the blood for investigations... i didnt' realized that tears falling down my cheek when i see her crying.. Arianna was admitted for 3 days for jaundice... we stayed at the hospital for phototherapy.. Her TSB (total serum bilirubin) was 356 but Alhamdulillah after 2 days it dropped to 175.. I was very happy when she was discharged..

Arianna Sofea, mama will always be with u ....

My precious baby Arianna Sofea

Sorry for not updating lately.. busy with the lil one. Alhamdulillah I have safely delivered a baby girl on 10/11/2010 @ 5.53am.. small baby 2.93kg.
Let me share stories of my delivery.. At 38 weeks, I went for a regular antenatal check up @ SDMC ..1st time I did my CTG.. For those who don’t know, CTG is done to check for any contractions and fetal heart beat. My Obstetrician, Dr Delaila told me my baby’s head is fully engaged but there was no contraction at all… CTG showed straight line… hehe not even a bit.. she predicted i would not deliver anytime soon.. maybe 1 week later..2 days later, I went to One Utama with ibu & ween because Auntie Ida wanted to give a lunch treat before I deliver. That morning we went for an early lunch @ Delicious. I had a yummy lunch, grilled balsamic mushroom sandwiches, drink iced chocolate & shared a few desserts hehe, Brownies ice cream, bread & butter pudding & apple crumble yummy…
at about 3pm, I went to the toilet & felt wet… I thought I accidentally pee on my undergarment.. But it became more & more @ 6pm… with some show..
Then later @ 7 pm, I started to feel the contraction pain..at first it felt like “ perut memulas” hehe so, I thought because of too much eating during lunch hehe..

At 8pm, suddenly I felt a gush of fluid from down there..my waterbag broke & that time I knew that the time has come.. Initially I wanted to wait until longer, but I couldn’t because the contraction pain was very painful,.. I couldn’t sit at all … I was sweating… so, Ibu adviced to go to the hospital…. Alhamdulillah abah gave a piece of paper with some surah n gave me air zam2 to drink.. Abah reminded me to read the surah for a smooth delivery… I was thankful that my parents, sister & hubby were there..

We arrived at the labour room @ 11.30pm.. Dr Delaila did the VE & os was 3cm.. She advised me for epidural as my contractions were too strong 3-4 in 10... 1cm for every hour.. means i have to stand the pain for another 7 hours.. Alhamdulillah, after epidural, the pain was less.. At least I can lie on the bed comfortably.. But I still couldn’t sleep… my hubby was seating on a chair beside me… he couldn’t sleep either.. Both of us were very excited .. Waiting to see our baby..

At about 5.20am…they told me it’s time to push, os was already 10cm..usually i'm the one who asked my patient's to push but now i know It is actually difficult to push..difficult to describe as well hehe. I heard subuh azan at 5.50am & soon after that i delivered my baby… Alhamdulillah, she came out smoothly.. Without epi.. I only had 1st degree tear Alhamdulillah.. Syukur Alhamdulillah, everything went smoothly. Thank u sayang for being there during my difficult times..



We decided to name our lil girl.. Arianna Sofea Bt Md Ariza.. Arianna means lively, Sofea means wisdom.. Giving birth is a wonderful experience.. I'm thankful to Allah for giving me & hubby this precious gift.. Hopefully I could be a good mother to Arianna Sofea & dedicated wife to my hubby, Ariza.. InsyaAllah..
Thank u everyone for the wonderful wishes & doa :)

Shopping list for newborn

hi everyone, i have started my maternity leave since last friday... currently still waiting for the baby to pop out hehe my baby girl taknak keluar lagi... so comfortable in me hehe

since i have some spare time, just wanted to update some of the things/ preparation for mummy to be before the little one's arrived..

Shopping lists for baby are as follows :

• baby cot / playpen

- IKEA baby cot... if u want a small cute baby cot, there is in IKEA about RM 369- 499

- BABY LOVE ..hAs a lOt of bAby cOt size... the mAin baby loVe shop is @ PanDan perDana..there is soMe baBy loVe cot @ Ovo in the curve.. the priCe ranGes frOm Rm 600-900

- MothErcare alSo hAs swEet, cute bAby cot bUt it's more pricEy, ranges frOm 1000 & above..

• baby bedding set

- Baby love 7pcs bedding set RM 229

- Bumble bee 4 pcs bedding set RM 199

- Luvable friends 4 pcs bedding set RM 399

- Mothercare bedding set ranges from RM 399-699

• bath tub, water temperature indicator
• baby towel, blanket
• baby healthcare & hygiene

-comb/brush, nasal aspirator, baby nail clipper, thermometer

• musical mobile -

- Fisher price RM 249, simple dimple RM 49, glomobile 159

• baby's apparel & receiving blankets
• baby mittens n booties
• breast pump, sterilizer

- Medela SWING electrical breastpump set RM 900

- Medela FREESTYLE electical breast pump set RM 2000

- Phillips AVENT ISIS manual breast pump 289

- Phillips bottle steriliser RM 289

• Baby strollers

- Combi urban walker RM 899 -1119

- Peg Perego Plico P3 RM 1399

- MAclaren Quest Sport Rm 849

- Quinny Zapp 2010 RM 888


For mummy to-be don't forget to prepare nursing bra, nipple cream, stretch marks cream, breast pads..

Enjoy shopping !

my baby shower ~ 17 October 2010

My baby shower was organized by my dearest sister ween & also with the help of my hubby & family... It was a surprise baby shower.. i went back to my parents house on that evening n was shocked to see most of my close friends were there.. thanks 4 coming Alia & Fazli, Shik, Nadia & Hafizzi, Anne & hubby, & jaja.. i really appreciate it . thanks for the baby book-shik, baby jumper from anne, baby towel from alia n baby accesories from nadia :)

The food and companion was great.. thanks to my sis ween, hubby n ibu & abah for organizing a sweet baby shower for me... i'm grateful to have this wonderful family with me through my pregnancy.. Please pray that i have a smooth delivery :)

my precious pregnancy

sorry for not updating so long... was busy with work in hospital seremban hehe... some of my friends was asking me to update about my 1st pregnancy...so here goes...

I knew the good news in March.. about 2 months after marriage... i was working in emergency department in HKL @ that time... i took 1 urine pregnancy test (UPT) & brought back home n test it by myself after 3 days i missed my period. it was a very faint double line .. hehe because of curiosity whether it's true positive or negative... i bought another 2-3 different UPT from watson... after 1 week, it was really POSITIVE... i was happy & smiling all the way :) my hubby was double happy n excited to tell his friends about the good news... i intend to keep to myself n family only as i knew 1st trimester is a very crucial period where risk of miscarriage is high... i prayed that my pregnancy will go on smoothly...

in my first trimester, Alhamdulillah i had no morning sickness... i had a blessed pregnancy :) but usually will feel very tired in the 1st trimester... i always sleep early at night.. around 9pm.. maybe because of our body is adapting to hormonal changes... heartburn is very common.. n because of that i tend 2 eat small frequent meals.. a small meal every 4 hours... some people will have constipation but drink a lot of water to overcome this.. my favourite drink during my 1st trimester is air jagung hehe don't know why but i bought it almost everyday hehe not forgetting, please avoid taking caffeine especially coffee.. it was quite hard 4 me to stop because i usually drink 2 cups/day but Alhamdulillah I managed to do it! hehe my gynae advice me to take redbull if i'm tired when i'm oncall... n it really works.. it has no caffeine but a lot of vitamins in redbull..

in the 2nd trimester... i felt less tiring n less heartburn... i started to feel baby's movements @ 20weeks.. it feels like butterlies in stomach @ first... when the baby grows bigger, u can feel baby's kick .. it was a great feeling :) i had my 1st antenatal checkup @ 16weeks @ SJMC... i was happy to see my small baby moving.. .there are a few good books for reading.. like "baby book" & "what 2 expect when ur expecting". i had small baby diary to jot down abt this precious pregnancy..

by 5 months, breast will be engorged & baby bump started to show.. i couldn't fit any of my pants n jeans... so, i went to buy some maternity pants n jeans from jusco... jusco had a lot of choices for maternity clothes with affordable price :) i was quite lucky because my sis ween also lend me some of her cute maternity clothes..

by 6 months, i often feel leg cramps early in the morning... it is common... but to overcome this, drink a lot of milk n calcium tablets.. i took 2 glasses of milk, 1 in the morning & night. back pain is common due to enlarging uterus.. it's makes it harder to sleep @ night.. to overcome this, don't lie flat.. lie sideways with pillow @ the back to support ur spine... wear flats n comfortable shoes k..

by 7-8 months, u will feel more tiring & breathless due to big tummy hehe i can't stand for a long time.. need to sit most of the time hehe.. but i love shopping for baby stuff hehe hilang penat walaupun jalan byk2 utk shopping baby's stuff.. it's therapeutic hehe baby gurl clothes are really cute :)

i'm currently @ 37 weeks... just waiting for the right time for the baby gurl to pop out hehe please pray that i have a smooth delivery InsyaAllah :) can't wait to see my baby gurl..

my beautiful wedding...

sorry again for not updating so long.. nearly 4 months...i was very busy preparing for my wedding at that time... January is a month of happy events.. 1st my birthday on th 15th january..it was a rather simple birthday celebration as all of us were busy with the wedding..but i'm very thankful that i was able to celebrate my birthday with my love one & my beloved family. n then my akad nikah on the 24th january..

5 days before my wedding - went for a mempelai package spa in serenity spa, concorde hotel... very relaxing & nice.. highly recommended for future brides hehe n then i went for a facial at herbaline...

2days before - my simple cream purple fresh flower dais by rass deco was already prepared..n not forgetting my bilik pengantin as well.. love it so much :) thank you kak ila..

my inai was done by ain..

a day before- i took the hantaran from kak dira..
wanted to sleep early that night but a few things rush in my mind...will i be a good wife & soon to be a wonderful mother? hehe i guess that's normal thing for a bride to be hehe Alhamdulillah I managed to sleep early that night..

My wedding day
i woke up early that day about 5.45am.. after performing solat subuh, i went down to look at my dais & arranging the hantaran in fresh cream roses..beautiful!! Kak Zetty from Udaimatunnur came as early as 8am to make me a beautiful bride.. wearing white silver modern baju kurung for akad nikah. .. Alhamdulillah at about 1015am, i have become ariza's wife.. Alhamdulillah in 1 lafaz i heard him say " aku terima nikahnya nurul azwa binti nurul azman dengan mas kahwin 300 ringgit tunai" i smiled... i didn't cry when abah performed the solemnization.. too happy to cry i guess.. after that he slipped in the beautiful estrella diamond wedding ring from diamond & platinum in my right ring finger..i did the same :) I'm grateful & thankful to Allah & my family for making this day come true... Alhamdulillah everything went well..

For my sanding, thanks to Emanier's boutique for making my heavily beaded purple kebaya with matching shoes & veil... love it! thank u for everyone who could make it to my special day.. really aprreciate it very much... for those who couldn't make it, thank u for ur prayers & wonderful wishes...May Allah bless u all...i'm very thankful that my family are there with me on that day N thank u to my dearest friends- alia, shik, ween n nadia for helping me a lot for my wedding...Alhamdulillah, now i have a new family... my family & my in laws :)